the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
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