is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
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