We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
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