god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
