no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
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