I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
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