I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
