I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I'm too high and old for this...
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
