i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Randomize