im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Randomize
