If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
