the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
