That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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