I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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