I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
