when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
