oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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