drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
i believe in u and ur pee
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
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