Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Randomize
