Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
