Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
