I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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