He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Randomize
