We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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