its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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