4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Houston, we have a blender
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
