Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
