I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
