White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
its liver damage thursday
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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