now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
My bed smells like the plague
Randomize
