I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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