Already got asked if we're dating
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
whose ass print is on the piano?
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
