Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Randomize
