he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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