"it" just moved
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
