sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
