I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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