Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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