Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
Buhtt sex?
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize
