I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
