New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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