Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Randomize
