I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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