i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Randomize
