I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
You need a sexual gate keeper
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
