they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Randomize
