this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
