id be glad to
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
