i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Randomize
