Swine flu. Run for my life!
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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